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Big Bad Wolf by Christine Warren

October 25, 2010

I’m always looking at other book blogs, not just because I’m always eager to hear about new books, but because I’m trying to figure out how this blogging thing works. In my searching, I’ve noticed that other reviewers state more information about the book than I have been doing. So, I decided to create a sort of template that covers my bases. Here it is (it’s dry stuff, so I won’t blame you if you skim).

Publisher: St. Martin’s Paperbacks

Publication Date: September 29, 2009

Format: Mass market paperback

Status: Eighth in The Others series (Second in the Fixed Series.)

Source: Purchased by self

Genre: Paranormal Romance

Other Info: According to Warren’s website, Big Bad Wolf is an expanded and updated version of the novel previously titled Fur Factor.

Missy Roper’s fantasies have revolved around Graham Winters since the moment they met. But the imposing leader of the Silverback werewolf clan always seemed oblivious to Missy’s existence. At least he was, until Missy collides with him at a party and then abruptly runs away—arousing Graham’s interest…and wild desires.

Lupine law decrees that every Alpha must have a mate, and all Graham’s instincts tell him that the sensual, beguiling Missy is his. Trouble is, Missy is human—every delectable inch of her. Convincing his clan that she’s his destined mate, and keeping her safe from his enemies, will be the biggest challenge Graham has ever faced. And now that he is determined to have her—as his lover and as his mate—Missy’s world is changing in ways she never imagined…

I’m usually a sucker for “she was right under my nose the whole time” romances, but this was one that did not work for me. I was pretty excited about it when I picked it up, but the disappointments kept on coming. First I discovered Big Bad Wolf wasn’t the first in The Others Series. Then I discovered that it wasn’t the swoony werewolf romance I was hoping for. It started out pretty bad and kept getting worse.

In the beginning, we meet the hero, Graham at a party. He’s that romance standard–the playboy. As the novel opens, he’s in a funk because he’s been celibate for thirteen days. Although I’m not sure thirteen days qualifies for the word. Anyway, Graham’s really bummed that his “different woman every night” philosophy hasn’t been as appealing to him as it formerly had been. In fact, as his “beta” (his second in command) points out, there aren’t many women at the party he hasn’t already slept with. Charming, right?

While Graham and his beta (Logan) are discussing the few women present that Graham hasn’t despoiled, the heroine shows up at the party. It’s her turn to be “fixed”. By which I mean that her friends have been setting her up on excruciating blind dates. Only they’re not dates so much as assignations. That night’s fix involves conservative Missy dressing up in a skanky, uncomfortable dress and high heels. Thus arrayed, Missy finally gets the attention of the one man she’s been drooling after for six months. Only he’s not a man, he’s a Lupine (werewolf) who is known for his promiscuity and his “I don’t date humans” attitude. One look at Missy’s scantily clad behind, however, and all of Graham’s objections to dating humans disappear. Graham literally carries Missy away from the party and into his lair (er, home).

I think that that all this was supposed to be romantic, but I should tell you that, although Missy and Graham have known each other for six months, Graham does not recognize Missy. At least, not until after they’ve slept together. Which brings me to another point: what self-respecting woman would sleep with a man who doesn’t recognize her after six months of acquaintance? Oh, wait, dumb question. A major factor in this novel is Missy’s low self-esteem. One thing that made me hate this book was that it was never resolved. Missy had some bad experiences in college, which lead her to hide herself behind the frumpy personality of a kindergarten teacher. Okay, it’s time for me to take a deep breath. And write a HUGE aside.

I am a teacher. I don’t teach kindergarten, but I work with kindergarten teachers and as part of my training, I worked in a kindergarten classroom. Warren’s characterization of Missy as a stereotypical kindergarten teacher infuriated me. First of all, teaching kindergarten is NOT all about teaching five-year-olds to tie their shoes. It’s an insult to kindergarten teachers–and how hard they work–to suggest that it is. Teachers work very, very hard. Working with five year olds is especially difficult and it takes a very special kind of person to do it well. It’s not all fun, games and singing songs. And despite the short classroom hours, it’s not a nine-to-five job. I don’t know any teachers who don’t take their work home with them in some way or another. The second thing I take issue with is the image of a frumpy kindergarten teacher. It’s true that some teachers dress as though they are still stuck in the 1950s. But there’s a lot of difference between dressing appropriately for working with five year olds and dressing in burlap sacks. I don’t mind that Missy is a frumpy dresser. It makes sense given her history and her low self-esteem, but for god’s sake, there was no reason to correlate it with her profession.

Okay, sorry. I had to get that off my chest. On to more book-related issues. Like, for example, Graham was a total jackwagon. He’s the worst kind of alpha hero. He makes all the decisions, he lies to Missy, and conceals important information from her, he’s controlling, he isolates her, he makes her participate in a disgusting, archaic tradition. He was a thoroughly repulsive hero. Here’s one small thing that set me off: As a Lupine, Graham’s body temperature runs warm. This means that he doesn’t need things like comforters or blankets on his bed. Missy is a human. Most of the time she’s in Graham’s bed (I bed your pardon, when she’s in bed and they’re not, er, otherwise occupied), Missy is naked and cold. At no time does Graham try to make her more comfortable by turning up the heat. All he does is throw her one scratchy, inadequate blanket. Ah, God, that pissed me off.

But, wait, that’s the not the worst of Graham’s actions. He makes a decision in the novel that is indefensible. This part is spoilery, so beware: Graham has sex with Missy knowing that she will get pregnant. He does this without consulting her or even telling her after the fact. Warren tries to justify this by telling us that Missy desperately wants children. But that’s not the point. If Missy’s willing to take the risk, great. They can make that decision together. But Graham doesn’t give Missy a choice. He makes it for her. And, in case you were wondering, yes, part of his motivation is that a baby will keep her by his side. Then, to compound matters, Graham brags about Missy’s pregnancy to his archenemy in front of her. Missy takes Graham to task for this–but has already forgotten the whole “I slept with you knowing it would result in a baby. Sorry I told my archenemy before telling you” thing. Gah.

I don’t even want to talk about the matehunt thing. If you read it, you’ll see.

Missy, though, needs to be addressed. In the beginning of the novel, we learn that Missy has been hiding herself since a bad experience in college. We’re never told what the bad experience was, though there are hints. Basically, whatever happened left Missy with some seriously low self-esteem. I think I mentioned that she sleeps with Graham while knowing that he doesn’t recognize her? Yeah. That basically sets the tone for their relationship. It kind of seems like Missy’s so amazed and grateful that Graham wants her–like, for life–that she’s willing to put up with anything. He’s sexy, he’s hot, he’s a scumbag–but he’s all hers! Puh-leeze! Grow a spine already.

I also need to mention the pathetic excuses that Missy has for friends. None of them makes a single on-screen appearance. This may be because Graham is an abusive, controlling boyfriend. Or it may be because they’re sucky friends. I mean, who wants to be friends with someone who makes you wear clothes you’d rather be caught dead in and setting you up for assignations you didn’t want in the first place. I mean, dates are one thing–but Missy’s fixes are meant to be more than that, if you know what I mean. Anyway, once Missy and Graham get together (which happens almost right away), Missy’s friends pretty much disappear. That was okay with me–I didn’t want to see any more of them anyway.

I feel like I could go on and on but I have to stop. I wish this book had been so bad it was good, but it was just bad. I won’t be giving the other books in The Others series a try. At least, not if they’re anything like this one.

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